If you are being hurt and feel that you are in immediate danger, call 911!
If you would like to speak to the Domestic Violence Coordinator, call (804) 501-5732. If no one answers, leave a message and the Domestic Violence Coordinator will return your call. You may also email the Domestic Violence Coordinator at [email protected].
What is domestic violence?
Domestic violence is a pattern of behaviors used by one person in a relationship to control the other person in the relationship. Domestic violence can occur between intimate partners or family members. Certain forms of violence may be criminal.
Some examples of domestic violence include:
- Name calling, insulting, or blaming a partner or family member
- Preventing a partner or family member from communicating with or visiting family or friends
- Controlling a partner’s daily activities including where they can and cannot go
- Stalking activities
- Sending numerous messages, calling repeatedly or sending unwanted gifts or letters
- Harassing a partner at their workplace
- Using tracking devices, monitoring a partner’s social media, using a partner’s passwords to access their accounts
- Showing up uninvited after being told not to
- Breaking or damaging a partner or family member’s property or belongings
- Destroying immigration papers or threatening to deport a partner
- Preventing a partner from getting or keeping a job or from attending school
- Withholding money, controlling financial assets, or damaging a partner’s credit score
- Forcing a partner to have sex with others, engaging in sexual activity without consent, coercing sexual activity, sabotaging birth control, sexual assault
- Physically keeping someone from leaving by blocking a doorway, hiding car keys, disabling a car, or locking them into a room
- Physical assault such as strangulation, punching, pushing, slapping, spitting, kicking, or biting
- Using weapons, including objects, to threaten or hurt a partner or family member
- Forcing a partner or family member to take drugs or alcohol
- Refusing to provide medical care or stealing prescription medication
- Deliberately preventing a partner from sleeping
- Using intimidation tactics
- Threatening or harming pets or using them to control family members
Strangulation and suffocation
Strangulation and suffocation are felony crimes in Virginia. Medical attention is essential if you have experienced these crimes. According to the Training Institute on Strangulation Prevention, nearly four in five victims of strangulation are strangled manually (with a body part). Almost all, or 97% of strangulation attempts, also involve physically assault.
There are many myths associated with strangulation and suffocation. Henrico County Police Division Detective Alex Kunz sat down with Bon Secours Violence Response Team Forensic Nurse Betsy Vick to address some of the most common misconceptions surround this topic.
How to safely intervene during a domestic-related situation
You only have a few seconds to intervene, but you hesitate. This happens to many of us when we witness a situation we believe might be domestic violence. Often, we talk ourselves out of intervening due to a fear of embarrassment or endangering ourselves, or we second guess our perceptions. However, there are possible ways to intervene if you think you are witnessing domestic violence in a public place.
- Contact Police. If you witness domestic violence occurring call 911. Witnessing domestic violence means that you are seeing an altercation occur or overhearing one that is actively occurring.
- Group Intervention. You might not feel comfortable approaching the couple on your own. Ask an employee or another citizen if they will approach the couple with you to ask if help is needed.
- Provide Diversion. This may be one way to help the situation you are witnessing from intensifying further. There are a few ways to provide potential diversions.
If you feel it is safe, consider letting the person using abusive behavior know that you are present. This can be accomplished by turning up the radio in your car, placing a real or fake conversation on your cell phone about what you are witnessing, or coughing loudly or something else that lets the couple know that you are close by and a witness to what is occurring.
Again, if you feel it is safe, consider striking up a conversation with the person you are concerned about by asking if they have the time, acting like you are old friends, or asking them where they got their clothes from. This may help to deescalate the conflict or allow you to safely separate the person you are concerned about by asking if you can talk to them away from the other person. Ask them if they need help, briefly share your concern, listen to them, and let them know there are confidential 24-hour helplines available for them to talk about what they are going through. Safe Harbor operates one of these helplines; the phone number is (804) 500-2755.
The reality is, if domestic violence is going to stop, we need to help and support victims who are often unable to speak out for themselves. Using caution is essential when choosing to approach a suspected domestic violence situation. It is safest to approach only when there are other people around, when you do not see or suspect a weapon is involved, and you feel that it is safe for you to do so. Your comfort level is of upmost importance when determining how to best intervene. Remember, even if your attempts are not welcome, leaving an abusive relationship is often a process and not a single event. A person knowing that someone else is concerned about their well-being could go a long way.
CASA – Vigilant Voices Episode
There are many ‘Vigilant Voices’ in our community, speaking up for the wellbeing of children. The Henrico County Police Division’s Domestic Violence Coordinator spoke on Henrico CASA’s Vigilant Voices podcast about how to safely intervene during a domestic-related incident.
Anyone can be a victim
Victims can be of any age, race, culture, education, sex, religion, employment, or relationship status.
Child Abuse
Children and pets in homes where abuse exists are more likely to be abused and/or neglected. Even if children are not physically harmed, they may have emotional and behavioral problems. Child Protective Services (CPS) operates under the Virginia Department of Social Services (VDSS) and has the responsibility under Section 63.2-1500, et seq of the Code of Virginia to:
- Receive reports of suspected child abuse or neglect;
- Respond to valid reports of suspected child maltreatment;
- Evaluate child safety;
- Support & strengthen families; and,
- Facilitate services to families to help ensure the safety of their children & prevent future abuse or neglect.
Elder Abuse
We are all aging, and it is imperative we reside in safe, helpful, and healthy communities. Unfortunately, elder abuse can come in many forms. The resources at Safety Connector offer information on elder abuse, neglect and exploitation while also provide information about safe and supportive connections for you and the people you care about.
Henrico County Adult Protective Services investigates reports of abuse, neglect, and exploitation of adults aged 60 and over and incapacitated adults over 18 years of age. The goal of APS is to protect a vulnerable adult’s life, health, and property without a loss of liberty.
Resources are available
Do you think you are being abused? Do you know a friend, co-worker, neighbor, or family member who is being abused? Do you think you are abusive, or do you know a person who is abusive?
If you have been the victim of a crime or have witnessed a crime, your participation in the criminal justice process is important.
The Henrico County Commonwealth’s Attorney’s Office has a Victim Witness Assistance Program to help you deal with the complexities of our criminal justice system. The staff of this program will advise you of your rights, inform you of the status of your case, and let you know what resources are available to help you.
Access the links below for assistance and information
- Henrico County Resources for Domestic Violence Information and Assistance
- Henrico County Community Resource List (updated Dec. 2025)
- Love is Respect: Resources to disrupt and prevent unhealthy relationships and intimate partners violence by empowering young people through inclusive and equitable education, support and resources.
- Stalking is a dangerous and frequently misunderstood crime that poses unique risks to victims and to communities. A Handbook for Stalking Victims and a Stalking Incident and Behavior Log are available in Arabic, Burmese, Chinese, English, Japanese, Korean, Portuguese, Spanish, Tagalog, and Vietnamese.
- Federal & State Firearms Laws for Domestic Violence Offenders:
- File/obtain a report with the Henrico County Police Division
“I’m Asking, For a Friend…”
The Henrico Police Division’s Domestic Violence Coordinator hosts the “I’m Asking for a Friend…” podcast. This podcast features survivors, officers, advocates, and other experts having conversations about domestic violence and related matters. We hope listening will lead to the start of more conversations, and safer and healthier relationships.
